So I hear there's an interesting new book out,
written by a descendant of famous pitchmen.
Ron of Ronco, Billy Mays, and others,
Sold us slicers, and dicers, and pocket fishermen.
If these guys can make f-ing millions,
Selling us stuff that soon falls apart,
Then why can't I make a few honest dollars,
Selling my original poetry and art?
NOW FOR ONLY $19.95! But wait, there's more!
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